How often have you heard or read about the importance of maintaining your relationship with your partner after having kids?
Sure, it makes sense. You shared a deep connection and life before children entered the picture but now, it’s exhausting to even get through the tasks of the day without having to worry about cultivating your relationship. Shouldn’t it just be fine on auto-pilot for a while until you get through this stage of parenting?
The reality is that it’s not just this stage of parenting you need to get through. Raising kids is at least an 18-year commitment and there’s no way a partnership, no matter how strong the foundation, can sit on a shelf for that long. The same is true for your friendships and your own self so don’t put those on the backburner either.
So how can you prioritize time together?
Money is often tight, babysitters are tough to find, and planning some big romantic gesture might be completely out of the question with your current bandwidth at its max.
I challenge you to move away from the notion that date nights have to be some grand event and instead focus on the connection that can take place when you make time solely for one another. Take back date night and make it yours (aka something that fits your schedule, budget, and interests).
Here are ten Tampa Bay area date ideas from an online therpaist to get the ball rolling on planning monthly one-on-one time with your partner. It even includes some low-cost creative ideas for a date night at home so no sitter is required!
Date Nights Out
Get out in nature.
The Tampa Bay area is ideal for outdoor exploring. With three scenic rivers and several parks, it’s easy to plan an active excursion. You could even bring along a picnic to share along the way.
Go to the Movies.
Sure, movies might not make for the best opportunity to chat, but there is something romantic about a drive-in movie theater. We are lucky in the Tampa area to have four of these nostalgic favorites nearby. Whether you opt to bring your own car picnic or buy concessions on site, the drive-in movie experience is one you’ll not soon forget.
Visit a Farmers Market.
Tampa’s farmers market game is strong, featuring several across neighborhoods and even some in the evening for those who can’t get out during the day. Take a stroll with your sweetie through the booths exploring the local offerings and let the fresh ingredients guide your plan to make dinner at home together. When you get home, one person can be sous chef and prep all the ingredients while the other does the cooking. Then you can make quick work of clean-up by splitting the dishwashing and drying duties.
Explore Local Landmarks.
Eat at Ybor City’s Columbia Restaurant, the oldest restaurant in Florida. It features a nightly Flamenco show with live music and the neighborhood is ideal for an after-dinner walk to explore historic architecture of this once Cigar Capital of the World. Or check out the Epicurean Hotel in Hyde Park/Soho. They offer cooking classes and feature a wine shop and restaurant. There’s even a spa if you want to book couples massages to relax before indulging in dinner.
Visit Seminole Heights, an eclectic neighborhood that features live music, craft beer, a gourmet food scene, and an art community that demands to be explored. Plan a beer tasting followed by dinner and live music or throw out an agenda and just wander, fully embodying those carefree days you enjoyed together pre-children.
Hit the water.
Whether you opt for a Pirate Ship Cruise on the Lost Pearl or take out a kayak or canoe with your partner, the excitement and sense of adventure you get being on the water can’t be denied. Plus working together to maneuver a boat can be a fun and challenging exercise. Bring along snacks or a picnic to share.
Plan a Brunch Date.
Whether you want bottomless mimosas, live music, scenic views, or the most creative takes on your breakfast favorites, Tampa’s got you covered. A brunch date is a fun excuse to share the morning together and you might even be able to drop kids for play dates with friends to avoid sitter fees. If you’d prefer, plan to make brunch at home and get all the items to make your favorite dishes together.
Get Crafty Together.
Take an art class together or simply pull out your kids’ art supplies and get creative at home. There are lots of art tutorials online for beginners and advanced artists alike so you can get your paint on without spending a dime. If you’d prefer some guidance in your artistic endeavor, check out local studios that offer classes and pick the medium you and your partner would enjoy learning together.
Pick a Theme and Plan a Night at Home Around it.
For example, if you decide to watch “Forget Paris” on the tv, plan to accompany it with wine, cheese, a baguette, and maybe even make crepes together for dessert. Or you could even order dinner in after the kids are in bed using the money you saved on a babysitter. While food delivery isn’t quite as exciting as visiting a restaurant, you can set up the house for the occasion with a picnic in the living room or by candlelight at the dining table. As an added bonus, clean-up is a cinch.
Consider a Day Date.
Whether or not you have a 9 to 5 job, a day date can be as simple as grabbing lunch together or more orchestrated by taking time off work to spend the day together. Visiting a museum, theme park, or aquarium is a totally different experience without kids and can rekindle that sense of carefree fun your relationship needs.
No matter how you choose to spend date time together each month, remember to focus on what brought you together and what you appreciate about your partner. Leave conversations about potty training, report cards, family drama, or work concerns at the door. Dig into common interests and ask questions of one another that rekindle long-paused conversations from your pre-kid times.
Finally, Remember to Not Hype Up the Date Too Much.
You don’t need to shave your legs, do your hair, and find the right outfit to make it special. In fact, adding the pressure to make date night perfect can end up backfiring and fueling anxiety. Do something you love together, whether that’s cooking at home or exploring a new restaurant, watching a movie, taking an art class, or painting at home. Don’t let the idea that you “should” go out for date night stress you out.
Coming out the other side of parenthood with your relationship intact and even stronger is the goal and to achieve it, start giving it the same attention and nurturing you give your children.
Begin Working With An Online Therapist in Florida, Hawaii, Colorado, and Louisiana
Taking the time for date night with your partner is a great way to cultivate stronger bonds. As an online therapist, I would be honored to provide support for your relationship from wherever is most convenient for you. I’m happy to offer in-person and online support across the states of Colorado, Hawaii, Louisiana, and Florida. You can start your therapy journey by following these simple steps:
Schedule a free 15-minute consultation via phone or video
Start strengthening your relationship today!
Other Services Offered with Ashley Clark Comegys
Couples therapy isn’t the only service I offer. I am happy to offer a variety of mental health support options to residents of Colorado, Hawaii, and Louisiana. Mental health services I offer include therapy for anxiety, online postpartum depression treatment, online postpartum support, and online depression treatment. I’m also happy to offer online grief counseling for women, military spouse therapy, and online trauma treatment for women. Visit my blog or about page to learn more today!